>Today was a fun day at the mall.

It just so happened that everything interesting was in relation to theft.

I was working at 5, went in a tad early and grabbed a few sodas at CVS. While I was checking out, the girl at the register was relaying this story to my clerk:

“So he just looked all surprised and dumb when it went off. He kind just stood there.

I said – could you come here?

He said – what? and just looked all dumb.

Turns out he stole some condoms, I mean c’mon, it’s got a sensor right on it.

So he asks me if they can buy them.

Of course you can buy them.

Oh — we thought we couldn’t, because they were pretty young…”

No kids — there’s no age limit on condoms, they’d rather have you be safe, now cough up the $4.50

A bit later on there was this whole cloak and dagger thing goin down. I had this girl about my age pretty much do the whole “psssst” and duck back out the front door. I looked confused I’m sure, they motioned for me to go out to the front door. I was rolling the possibility of being jumped around in my head for a brief seccond, then realized there was no harm in at least listening to them.

There was a guy as well, quite a bit older, maybe 38 or so — both were in street clothes, so I wasn’t quite sure if they were loss prevention for some store in the mall.

They were all excited about two girls — I wasn’t sure what these people were up to, if not loss prevention then what? They were framing someone for shoplifting? I did as they requested and checked out the fitting rooms to be sure they didn’t grab anything. We had locked them all earlier, so nothing.

Next thing I know the girl popped up over to my right, I thought “she’s really good at this” and meandered over in that direction.

“Could you at least look at the bag, see if it’s got anything in it, because it was empty when they came into our store”

Ok — I could do that, I walked by them and sure enough the Old Navy bag they were toting was certainly weighted — there was something.

I let her know, she thanked me and was gone.

About an hour later we received a few shirts back, turns out they nabbed them a little bit after they left our store.

It was all so exciting with the hiding, and the sneaking…

..and then there was this couple who came in, the guy was somewhat hanging on the woman, she’d allow it, then pull away – toying. I was nearby, just folding – dum de dum dum… and they were looking at some clothes and joking.

He puts his arm around her again and I hear him say – you never gave me a reason…

Yeah I did… you have a wife, a WIFE.

He just kinda brushed it off, and as they walked out the door he was still hanging on her.

Ahh to be a fly on the wall.