I most likely won’t play, and certainly won’t buy Mass Effect 3. It’s not that I don’t want to, I really do. I just do not have what it takes to play the game. I have failed countless times at the original. I just recently went back to it after a push by my friend who is a big fan of the series. I resumed my last game from January 2011, my first save game date? November 2008.

I don’t think there’s any danger of spoilers so here goes: I’m a Spectre, Captain of the Normandy – went right to the dig site and attempted to rescue the archaeologist. I get all the way through to what I assume is the last battle with a cinematic of reinforcements arriving, for them, with jumpy scampering crab aliens. I pop my head out from cover to aim, not even to pop out, just getting close to the edge enough to peer over – zap. One shot. I even tried it once where I turned tail to go down the hill to attempt to get cover before running back to the killer buggy of doom so I could zap them with the turret. I didn’t even make it two steps. I’ve tried hiding, letting the other members of my team do all the work and I only fire if they get behind the lines. I’ve tried healing myself – I tried 3 separate times and I only ever got 1 med pack applied because they killed me right afterwards.

The game is on easy for chrissakes! I consider myself pretty good at a video games. I’ve tried strategy, I’ve mixed up my group, I have the best guns, armour, and everything that I have found or could buy with my limited credits. Flat. Every time, and the savegame I made? I’m pretty sure it’s from when I restarted. I remember getting to this point before, this same spot. I didn’t remember the story, but I remember the animation when all the reinforcements arrive. This is frustrating the hell out of me.

I’d really like to see how the story progresses, making my decisions and having it feed into the other games. I own ME2. I’ve never gotten to it. This is one of those “sure, I’d love to watch you beat it some time”. I know when I’m bested. I’m either too smart, or too dumb for you Mass Effect, I have a suspicion it’s the latter.