Those 4 days went by slowly. I went to work on Monday but that night had Nicole feeling very anxious about the baby’s arrival. I worked from home on Tuesday expecting we’d be going in at any time but I worked through the entire day without much incident. Nicole was tired, very pregnant and a couple days past her due date so anything seemed like it could be the time. We went food shopping because we finally had to. We had been avoiding because we didn’t want things to spoil if we had the baby and didn’t get back to the house right away. We made dinner, sat down to watch some TV afterwards and sure enough her water broke.
We went to the hospital about 9:30 or so, got into an admission room about 10:15. We sat there for some time waiting, heard a few other expectant mothers be told they should go back home and wait, but after a few double and triple checks they were able to admit us. I was glad, I didn’t want it to all be for naught. Nicole was having very minor contractions at this point – possibly one every 10 minutes or so. We finally were admitted to a room about 1:30am. The contractions still weren’t all that severe so they advised us to get a good night’s rest for the full day ahead. We had sent texts or called the major people to relay the message and we settled in for the night.
The next morning I woke roughly 8:30. They had already woken Nicole up, gotten her breakfast and started her on a steady drip of Pitosin. Eventually family started trickling in, Nicole’s mom and step father, my mother, and her sister. Nothing much was happening, they visited for a while and left for some lunch. The contractions had started ramping up at that point and it was mainly me in the room. Her mom and sister popped in once or twice after but once the contractions really started hitting her, there wasn’t much visiting to be done. Nicole had wanted to try it for as long as she could without an epidural and she did very well, but it was really starting to hurt. She tried the birthing ball, but it took so long for them to get it to her she was a bit out of sorts for it by the the time it arrived. She was going to try the shower as well, but considering how long it took them to get the ball, we were both concerned with how long it would take someone qualified to inject something into her spine to get there so we ordered it.
It took them another good 30 to 45 minutes but they arrived, an anesthesiologist and a medical student I gathered because she was so young and full of inquiry to the seasoned one. They placed it and Nicole began to feel the numbing. There was one key misunderstanding though. They had the tube in and they asked where Nicole felt it, she understood the question to relate to their finger, not to the tube. The finger was right in the middle, the tube, as it turned out – was a bit to the left.
Nicole felt into an instant calm, a little too calm. She relaxed, smiled and laid back as they asked her questions about how she felt. She said she felt good, but her chest was a little tight… right before the pulse monitor measured a severe drop. Her heart rate plummeted and she was breathing very slow. They immediately stopped the epidural drip and let it ease off. She continued to have minor contractions during this time unbeknownst to her. Family came in again for a quick conversation, she was very upbeat, and a tad loopy but happy. She had decided to forgo any narcotics for fear it would interfere with the baby’s health and her ability to participate in the experience, I attributed it to relief and fatigue. She recalled a very amusing story about her young nephew having a blast with his Massachusetts accent and one particular phrase.
The relaxation went by the wayside once the epidural was started back up, as the large initial dose they had provided her subsided she began to feel a “window” were the contractions were hitting with full force. They kept asking her to give it time, moved her around a little to try and move the numbing to the area to no avail when the anesthesiologist was called again to assist. The original two had left for the day but a new one was on. He made an adjustment, pulling it out a little bit but that too proved to be too little. After about 2 hours or so of resumed full pain he came back yet again to redo the epidural. Thankfully, as he was very careful and sure about where the needle was placed, it did what it was supposed to do and the pain subsided.
About 7pm or so Nicole was finally able to get some rest, I went down for a nap as well since I had been helping the entire time. I kept thinking how I knew this was going to be difficult for Nicole but never imagined it would be so much work for me. Little did I know that was just the tip of the iceberg. I woke up about 9pm and she was still sleeping. I went out to the waiting room to reconnect with family while she got a little more sleep. I hung out there for about an hour or so and I must say that was probably one of the longest hours of my life. America’s Got Talent was on the TV, we weren’t really watching it but no one was in too good a shape for real conversation so once I had relayed the major information – that was what I focused on.
About 10pm a nurse came to get me, Nicole was up and asking for me. I went in to see how she was doing. The contractions were closer, more regular, and it seemed like it was going to happen. We were really shooting for the 29th because that was our friend Heather’s birthday and it looked like it just might happen. She went through the contractions much better with the epidural, she could still feel them, but they wasn’t the pain she had before it. Nicole kept wanting to converse, but based on the feedback from the machine measuring her pulse it was best when we were both quiet. Whenever she would start talking her pulse would drop and the alarm would go off, I advised her to stay calm and relax, but our short purposeful conversation continued as she kept working through the contractions. In hindsight, Nicole had a somewhat low nominal blood pressure anyhow, the machine was just picking up a slight drop so overall it wasn’t something to be concerned about but I couldn’t help feeling concerned watching the readings dip into the red whenever she’d start talking. I just tried to keep us both calm and working through the contractions.
Finally around 11pm the midwife decided she should start pushing. The average was 1 to 2 hours, I was hoping for less – that didn’t happen. A good hour… then close to 2 and the baby was finally starting to show. Nicole was tired, I was tired but just trying to keep her going. The midwife was great, kept her counting and pushing and finally we were making headway (ha!). About 2 hours and Nicole was really feeling it. Finally, the midwife told her to feel the head – she did and realized it was almost there. A few more minutes and finally the baby came out.
The head was very long, oblong and alien like in it’s shape. All purple and bloody, wrinkled like he had been in the bath for 9 months or so. The baby was lifted up and I looked on in anticipation, I didn’t even see the cord around his neck because the midwife was so good. As she was lifting him out she had already begun unwrapping so by the time he was all the way out, it was off. I then saw it was a boy and made the announcement! They put him right down on Nicole as they cleaned him up. He was crying by this point after they cleared his mouth. He looked so small and just as tired as his mother. It really was beautiful, my new son.
They brought him over to the corner of the room to examine him, weigh him, and we hoped to have him back shortly. He was crying a bit more anxiously now, with short quips of breath. The doctors started conferring with each other in hushed tones. I was concerned, but they spoke to us as soon as they determined what they were going to do. Since they had concerns with his breathing he needed to go up to NICU (newborn intensive care unit) but we could come see him within an hour.
I had minor concerns because I wanted our baby to be with us, and have as much skin to skin contact in the first few hours as possible, but knew that I had a brief period in the ICU as a newborn as well so knew it could still be alright. It was alright after all – he was wonderfully healthy, and I will continue in pt 2.